The question I seemed to be asked constantly lately is: "What are you going to major in?" or at least some form of that question. Up until recently that question was one I never even hesitated on. I wanted to be a teacher. Duh. I was going to major in early childhood education and spend my days surrounded by little kids. For as long as I can remember I wanted to be a teacher. I remember being in first grade and talking with one of my friends. We seemed to have life all planned out with going to Calvin College and both becoming teachers. Other careers have caught my eye but rarely have they kept my attention for long. As a little girl I remember coming home from school and setting up all my stuff animals and dolls for a lesson and putting on my teacher glasses. I would teach just about every subject in school including; English, writing, Bible, dancing, performances of my off key singing but of course no math. (Yucky!)
Now, I don't know if that is what I want.I am still in love with the idea of being around little children...but that is not my only interest. I feel pulled in multiple directions. I can picture myself doing multiple things.
I spend a lot of time thinking about my major. I find myself day dreaming about what my future could look like during class, while I do homework or when I am trying to fall asleep at night. I know in general that I am a people person and I love talking. I could not sit at a desk and type information into a computer. I would go nuts. Beyond that my mind just goes crazy.
A teacher...of little kids for elementary or early childhood, high school aged? I could do both. I love the idea about teaching the basics to children. I love elementary children and the excitement most of them have about learning. They always have the most ridiculous things to say as well. There is also draw to high school. I would love to just teach creative writing-or any English really, cooking classes, family classes, or psychology classes. The idea of being a teacher has many options to run with.
I recently have been tossing around the idea of becoming a marriage and family counselor. Listening to people and trying to help as best I can has always been something I loved. I love it when my friends come to me and I have the opportunity to be a listening ear so that they can be heard. I would have the choice of majoring in psychology or social work. I would major in psychology most likely with a minor in communications. I love observing people and figuring out why they may react to a situation compared to someone else. I love watching families and seeing the way things are done to create their atmosphere.
Those are the only two possible careers that I have researched and looked into...I still do not know.
I just don't know.
I would to be a nanny for a while during college and possibly after.
Possibly a teacher.
Possibly a counselor.
I could end up in ministry.
I don't know.
My absolute dream job would be hanging out with middle school and high school aged girls. Just hanging out with them by being an influence in their lives through listening and being there when they need me. I would love to be the example of Christ to them. I would love to remind them how precious they are. I want to tell them that no guy can fulfill them like Christ. I want to tell them that they deserve the best and should never settle or just be who the world wants them to be. They are worth waiting for. Their heart is precious. That is where the possibility of ministry comes in.
Another dream job would be snuggling with babies and toddlers and telling them they are loved.
I may not know the answer to that question: "What do you want to major in?" or "What do you want to do with your life?"
There is a few things I do know.
I know that I am OK with not knowing these answers. A few months ago the idea of the unknown was not even a possibility. I had to know what was going to happen. Now? I am at complete and utter peace about the idea of the unknown. It is exciting and I am beginning to embrace it. I like discovering the things I love. I like looking at all the possibilities and knowing that I can choose. Yes, I definitely still want to know and I struggle with trusting the unknown, but I know that I have no choice, so I have decided to try to embrace it.
I know money doesn't matter to me. I would rather be the poorest person in the world and be doing something I love with the gifts I have been given than be rich doing something that makes me dread work day after day. That is also a recent development from this past summer. There are days that I dream about an extreme future with the fancy car, big house and the jet ski. I may have that one day. Only God knows. I would rather be doing something that I love using the gifts God gave me. I would rather live in a small apartment with the occasional nail treatment. I would rather provide my children with love and a healthy steady household than money. Money isn't everything.
I know God knows. He is going to get me to where I need to be. So there is really no point in me trying to figure it out anyway because God doesn't usually do what I want anyway(:
So when someone asks me what I am going to major in or what I want to be when I get older I just tell them that I don't know because what I do know is enough for me.
I may not know what my future holds, but I know who holds my future. -Tim Tebow
“What no eye has seen, nor ear heard,
nor the heart of man imagined,
what God has prepared for those who love him.” 1 Corinthians 2:9
Love, Hannah
xoxo
